We've all seen the video of that one kid throwing a fit because his mom disconnected him from his World of Warcraft account, and I know that we aren't all that crazy when it comes to our games, but let's face it, interruptions are annoying and sometimes they can get the best of us when we are already in a highly stressful situation such as just almost getting that one raid mob that you have been trying to take down for weeks dead, or in the middle of some fairly even matched pvp.

I bring this up because I had an episode of my own just a few days ago, and it made me so angry that I went on ranting and raving about it for most of the day only to find myself laughing at what a jerk I'd been later on, after things had cooled down a bit.  But let me just tell you about it.

So I'm on this spying mission.   My goal is to get into a heavily patrolled city without being noticed, speak to a few contacts (which I of course have scouted out in advance), and then proceed to pick-pocket a variety of scouting and patrolling guards for any orders or intelligence that they might be carrying.  My boss has assigned me to get 10 pieces of this information, and there is a recharge timer on how often I can use the pick-pocket skill as well as a chance at failure every time I make an attempt.  Meanwhile the guards of this city, who are all real people, not npc's, and who are touchy enough as it is, are all running around shaking down anyone who doesn't look like they belong, and I quite obviously look like I do not belong.

Are you getting the picture?  This is about as stressful an MMO situation as any, and it is about the worst time for the telephone to start ringing and for me to look over and see that it's the mortgage company's number calling.

I ignore it.  I paid that shiz, I'm not the droid they are looking for, plus I am only just outside the city walls and so far no one has even looked at me.

I continue on in my mission of stealth and intrigue.  My pulse is beginning to beat faster now as I come into the line of sight of a few players with that tell-tale yellow glow above their heads that signifies that they are part of the city patrol.  I begin to take evasive actions, leaping from roof-top to roof-top to avoid their gaze.  My contact is just up ahead.  All I have to do is make it to him, get what I need, and bounce for a minute until the heat cools down.

I see him up ahead.  I make a beeline.  Just then my wife opens the basement door and shouts my name.  "What?!?" I answer.  "Did you move the money into the right account so that the mortgage check could clear?"  "What?!?!" I respond again.  Whatever she is saying sounds like Greek to me, and I am not Greek.  My contact is right there in front of me.  I click on him in order to talk and get my first piece of information, the most important piece of this trip. 

I hear my wife snort and come pounding down the stairs.  "Why do they walk like that?" I half wonder in the middle of everything else that is going through my mind right then.  "And if they are going to stomp all over the place shouldn't they also develop some kind of saying to go along with it?  Like Fee, Fie, Foe, Fum! or something?"

I'm trying hard to ignore her.

"Hey!" she snaps.  "Did you move the money to the right account so that the mortgage check could clear?" 

I get attacked by a city patrolman with an itchy trigger finger.  "Hold on for a minute", I say.

Now a little note here.  This woman has played these games with me.  We have both played on open PVP servers together.  She knows exactly where I'm at right at that moment, and yet, amazingly, she doesn't care in the least. 

I find this incredibly annoying all of a sudden, the guard is pounding on me, another has joined in and so I know that there is no way that I am going to win this thing, but I am at least beating the one that attacked me initially pretty badly, and all I need is another two or three minutes to finish this thing off and then I will be happy to turn my chair around and address whatever mortgage faux pas that has taken place with all of the attention and caring befitting of my dear sweet lovely wife.

But in the most famous words of that one song from the old punk bad Suicidal Tendencies..."BUT SHE WOULDN'T GIVE IT TO ME!!"

And so of course, I freaked out.  "WOMAN!!" (that's how you know it's about to go down)  "WOMAN!!" I said spinning around in my desk chair and completely abandoning the entire fight, game, and screen.  "WHAT IN GOD'S NAME ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?!?!"  "I PAID THAT SHIZ!!!  I ALWAYS PAY THAT SHIZ!!!  WHY IN THE WORLD ARE YOU MESSING WITH ME RIGHT NOW!!!!!"

Well, that didn't go well.

Some people never argue.  They talk to each other in a calm monotone fashion, saying only what they mean and completely understanding that each member of the conversation is an individual and justified in having their own feelings and perceptions of the world even if those feelings and perceptions do not agree with their own.

My wife and I are not like that.

What WE like to do once we get arguing, is to stand about four inches from each others face and use our "down the street" voices to debate over who is the most childish and least willing to take responsibility (her opinion of me) and who gives less of a shiz what she thinks (my argument :P).

So we do that for like an HOUR.  Then I go and look at the bank account and find out that she processed the payment before putting the money where it belonged.  The long and short of that being that it was HER FAULT.

Now I know we all make mistakes.  I've made mistakes.  And who really cares if the mortgage guy gets his money a day late or a month late, he's gonna get his money one way or another or someone is going to be out of a house.  But at just that moment.  That moment when we figured out that I not only....

A. Had nothing to do with the problem at hand.

And

B. Had missed out on one of the golden opportunities of PVP, which is, in a gank situation, to take at least one of them with you.

I could not help but give her the look.  What look you ask?   You know that look.  That "Look at what you've done to me" look.

Later I felt bad about the whole situation.  But then 5 minutes after that I couldn't help but laugh at how mad I had become over the whole deal.  See, it wasn't the game itself that I cared about so much, it was the emotion of that moment.  That moment in time when my attention was completely focused on one thing and one thing only, just to have something completely foreign to that moment invade my brain with distraction.

I'll bet that if the mob was hard enough to take down, and I had a large enough role in potentially getting that job done, that a long lost relative, previously thought to even be dead, could pop up at my door and I would tell them "Hold up!  I gotta finish this!!" before acknowledging one single thing about their re-appearance.

That's how good it gets sometimes.  At least in my understanding.

(Author's note.  Although the topic of this blog talks about subjects such as neglecting one's responsibilities in lieu of playing video games, such actions are not considered actually acceptable and should not be attempted at home.  With that said however, I would still love to hear some of the moments when you've either been un-ignorably distracted from your MMO playing, or not, and how you responded.)

Jesad

So I've finally made it.  It took some 17 years, not counting the pen and paper days, it also took a lot of writing, a lot of thinking, and a lot of hard lessons, but I have finally graduated from Hardcore, to Old School, to ..............drum roll please!!!!

MMO Codger!

You ever have one of those days when, love em as you do, the dang kids just wear you plum out?  (and yes, I am using words like "dang" and "plum" to relay my codgerness, also because I CAN!)

So I'm playing Age of Wushu the other day (all the coolest kids are you know?), and I'm grouped up with these two guys who are determined to finish out this instance that we are in (Twilight Village for those of you in the know).

Now normally I am all for skill and perserverance.  In fact my Old School persona felt that anyone, below the age of 30, who still had ego enough to continue attempting to clear a level that they had now suddenly become dangerously underpowered for was someone with qualities that should be respected.

But these guys, for whatever reason, decided that it would be wiser, instead of pulling the guy away from his henchmen, or removing his henchmen from the equation, that we would instead only take out the first two guys standing in the corner, and then fight the main guy in that same corner, hoping and praying that the rest of his 6 - 8 other friends wouldn't see the need to get invovlved.

We pulled that scenario 5 times.  5 times we were promptly dispached, complete with statements in regards to how weak our Kung-Fu was (which I really enjoy for some weird Saturday Morning Kung-Fu Theatre reason) for good measure.  Until finally, I heard myself saying something in my mind that must have made me grow at least 4 grey hairs right there on the spot.

You ready for this?  Cause this is how you will know that you have crossed that line when it comes.

I said, "Young people waste so much time trying to save time!"

And 4 grey hairs popped out of my head instantly.  On top of that I could feel my blood pressure (pressha if you're from where I'm from) going up, and my Sciatica, and Gout both kicked in at the same time!

And you just knew that they were young too because that had that whole runnie around chattie thing going on.  You know "Hey! follow me, over here, now over here kill this guy, now over here, why are you sitting down?  Hurry, come help me before it kills me!!!"

I almost actually said something out loud too but I was afraid that if I did my rig would instantly fall three to four upgrades behind (as if even having a rig these days cellphones doesn't already antiquate me to some)

(and what is the deal with these new phones anyway?  When I was a kid, it was all about getting that thing down to Dick Tracy size so that you could wear it on your wrist!  Who's bright idea was it to then start making them bigger and bigger until now they are bigger than the old 80's "wireless" phones that everyone used to make fun of!?!?  You put that thing to your face now it's like answering a pancake!) and everyone would have updated to T3 lines while I was still in the middle of my two year cable modem contract.  So I just chilled, and died with them repeatedly instead. 

Besides, who was I to give these kids grief like that?  I used to be just like them once, well....maybe not JUST like them, but I can recall more than one day when the right epiphany at the right time just didn't come.

(And if you had to go back and re-read those last couple of paragraph's because you somehow lost your place, you are either too old and need to go and get your reading glasses, or too young and need to have your meds adjusted.  Land sakes, people can't even focus to read anymore!)

But it all got me to thinking. 

"Oh my god what is happening to me?!?! " LOL

No, really, it got me thinking that In spite of my best efforts, video games, wild parties, several wives, and a firm devil-may-care attitude, that I have still turned into my grandparents.  Which, in a way was kind of depressing, but in a whole nother way (yes nother), it was kind of cool too. 

Cause see, as old as I was, I was still playing with the kids.  I was still able to connect with them at least on some kind of level (even if that level was in being a complete idiot instead of just clearing the room and taking the guy down).  And that made me happy.  Because when I first started playing MMO's, there was not a person over 30 in my family that would even come near a computer.

But wait, I lie.  They came, but when they did they did embarrassing things like calling the computer "the hard drive" or trying to get all technical and calling the "the central processing unit".

"It's a computer darn it!  Just a computer." I would say.  And they would look like they were about to say something for a minute, but then they would just chill instead.

But yeah.  As I get older and older, the things that I see annoy me more and more.  The cheating, the side stepping, and all of the hurry that goes into making shorter that which was made to be long for our enjoyment.  And pretty much I get to this point in my game where I don't even want to be social, don't even want to talk to anyone, just want to be that solo guy.

But then I don't log off either.  Because a real codger would rather stay and complain.

At least that's how it is in my understanding.

I wonder how many others are like me on this very site?

Ok, going way off post on this one.  Call it a public service announcement.

You can save yourself a lot of build-up reading by skipping to where I say "So I get the Core i3 machine."

Christmas just passed, Merry Christmas btw.  And this year for Christmas I had this great idea that I would ask everyone to give me the same gift, a gift card from my local computer store.  The theory at work here was that it was time for an upgrade.  So instead of shelling out all of my hard earned cash on a new rig, I'd just use my collected gift cards as a discount.  Heck maybe if I had more friends or family that loved me I'd have even have enough to purchase the entire thing!

Well that didn't happen.  But I did get enough to represent a pretty good discount.  And so off to the store I went.

Now some people have all the money in the world, some people save, other people buy barebones and build from there, and other's still suffer through screenshots pretending to be games, always losing at pvp, and having to decrease their settings to the point that they can barely make out that it is even a game that they are playing anymore before forcing their selves to go into the local computer store and purchasing just what they can afford to get them back into the game.  I have been all of these people at one time or another, but this year you can slot me into the latter category as times have been tight.

So of my choices there are two machines, an AMD with a quad core processor with built in video capabilities, and a Core I3 machine.  Yeah, yeah, I know that statement just opened me up for all you guys who want to tell me how I should have gotten this or that which would have been so much better.  And although I could spend a few paragraphs going over all of the things I have traded for the ability to live on the cutting edge of computer hardware, instead I will just say that this is what I could afford.

So I research the AMD machine.  The processor is strong, the video (amazingly enough which is onboard) gets good reviews.  Heck, it even left room for you to put in a discrete video card (that's the new name for video card btw, and the fact that they had to call it something other than video card should tell you that something was becoming rotten in Denmark) and provided the discrete video card was of a certain brand, it would team up with your onboard card and allow you to operate in SLI mode.  Rumor had it that even without the addition of the extra card that one could still run such graphically intensive twitch games such as Crysis on full settings just using the onboard card.

All in all I have to say, it was a nice rig for the price.  But then I researched the Core I3 machine.

The processor benchmarked at only a little less than the AMD, but the price was a full $150 less.  With a 2 gig Nvidia GT 620 only being around $70, and me not being the graphically intensive twitch gamer type, I figured that it would be a steal to get this rig.  I could then slap a bigger processor and/or video card in later and not be confined to the two or three particular video cards that the AMD machine said I would have to buy in order to take advantage of their onboard SLI feature.

I figured that this was a pretty forward thinking process.  This was before I realized what Secure Boot was all about.

So I got the Core i3 machine.  I took it home and fired up my current favorites and, one by one, test the onboard video.  It wasn't bad but there were still things to be desired, and for the price of a new rig in this economy, the one thing that I didn't want to feel is like I didn't get my money's worth.  So I popped back to the store and picked up the video card.  I took it home, it took all of 10 minutes for me to slap it into my rig, and BOOM! the new BSOD (Black Screen of Death).

So here I am panicking, unable to get anything to work.  The new machine was Windows 8 based so, as you may know, safe mode was gone!  There was no way to force the machine into VGA mode and no way to hook up an extra monitor to the old card as, being the tech savvy guy that I am, I had disabled it through windows.  There was no way to enable the onboard card in the bios either.  In short, I was SOL.

My one saving grace was that there was a boot option command that seemed to come up just before the machine BSOD'd.  Using this command I was met with three options...

1. Use UEFI with legacy OPROM

2. Boot to legacy BIOS

3. Remain in UEFI Secure Boot Mode

Did I mention that my old rig was a windows XP machine?  It looked like I had some reading to do.  So I went out into these internets, armed only with those three options and found out what UEFI Secure Boot Mode was.  To make what has turned into a really long story a little shorter, UEFI is what some want to replace the old Basic Input Output System (BIOS) with, and Secure Boot Mode is an option of that system that allows the people who built your computer to sign all of the hardware that was in it when they built it, in order to provide you with an extra layer of protection against viruses that might attack your system on really low level.

Viruses, btw that my friends and family have been calling me paranoid for saying that they exist for years.

To put all of this into layman’s terms.  The reason that my machine had gone to black was because I had upgraded my video card, and that card was not a signed piece of hardware created by my hardware manufacturer.  The remedy?  Simple, either remove the offending piece of hardware, or turn off the UEFI secure boot mode, thus making myself now susceptible to the risks of low level infection.

So I figured I would turn off the secure boot mode, let the machine boot up with the new piece of hardware, then re-enable it with the update, you know, like you do with most anti-virus software after putting in a new program.  No sir.  You see, once you deviate from what the manufacturer says you should have in your machine, you are now tossed out of the land of secure boots akin to the way God tossed Adam out of the garden of evil.  And by that I mean, ne'er to return.

So at this point I am of course thinking "I should have gotten the AMD."  But then, would not the same thing have happened the moment I attempted to upgrade to their promised SLI pairing?

The point I am trying to make here is that MOST of us, if not all of us who are in the habit of purchasing prebuilt factory machines are also in the habit of upgrading the pitiful excuses for graphic cards that they sell many of these machines hard-wired with.  Now, with the inclusion of the UEFI Secure Boot, the average gamer, meaning you, if you are on a budget, me, and especially your KIDS, are all now forced to either buy the more expensive, pre-built, pre-signed gaming rigs, or be excluded from the world of safety that those who do not game, or those who can afford to buy those rigs, can now enjoy.

In my understanding that makes us kinda targets, don't you think?

Ok, going way off post on this one.  Call it a public service announcement.In my understanding that makes us targets, don't you think

This is going to jump around a bit because it is a big topic.  I will try to stay focused however.

So I had an epiphany this week.

It occurred while I was in vent (Ventrillo) with a few "friends" while playing my favorite MMO and working on some endgame content.  The conversation had become a little bit stale, as it sometimes can when a group has been together for while and everyone has become a little tired, and so I asked what I thought would be a reasonable "chatty type" question.  "So has anyone seen the new Batman movie yet?"

I'd figured that it was a safe enough question.  It was the third in the series, Heath Ledger died making the second and all, Christian Bayle you know what I'm saying?

I was surprised however to find out that of the 8 people that were in the channel at that moment, not only had none of them seen the latest chapter in the Dark Knight trilogy, but not even one of them was even interested!!! 

The answers that I got ranged from "I don't go to the movies" to "I'm not into that", with everything from "I'd rather watch some anime" to "I haven't seen the last three of those films" thrown in between.  What was even stranger however was that no one thought that it was at least a little bit weird that we were all sitting in a chat channel, while simultaneously playing a fantasy game, and that only one of us was even remotely interested in movie featuring what must have been one of the greatest adult and children's fantasy characters ever created!!!

Now I'll tell you, I've never been one for genre specificity, so you can sue me on this point.  I do not believe that there is much difference in the reasons for suspending your belief save for the fact that it is for entertainment purposes.  To elaborate on that concept more, I believe that if you like dungeons and dragons type stories i.e. Conan, The Dragonriders of Pern, A Song of Ice and Fire, then there is very little reason that you shouldn't like science fiction type stories such as Star Trek, Star Wars, or anything by Phillip K. Dick, or likewise comic book stories, Superman, Batman, The Avengers, the Justice League, etc...

Many of these stories actually bleed together such as Thor, the comic book character being taken from Thor, the actual ancient god of worship who appears in the Unearthed Arcane of the Dungeons and Dragons game (2nd Edition) as a deity to be worshipped by players of that game, and who is the basis for many of the deity typed concepts used in many...many an MMO.

Robert E. Howard's "Conan the Barbarian" and Mike Grell's "Warlord" are two characters ripped right out of the pages of "fantasy" typed stores (as the term fantasy is currently defined) who were introduced to many a reader via the pulp comic book genre, and Conan went on not only to star in his own films, both past and present, but to have an MMO titled after him as well!

So without going on and on about this, I didn't understand it.  How was it that I had found myself the low percentage in a group of folks who were interested in the Batman movie, or even movies or television in general?

My wife, known as Kaleina in the games, would solve this quandary for me with a little insight.

She said to me "You know how you're always complaining about how no one cares about the games anymore?  How all you ever hear about are parsers, and who did the most dps, and how no one cares to explore the more intricate nuances of their characters anymore? You know how you are ALWAYS complaining about how no one wants to create a WORLD anymore!!!?!?!"

"Well now you see why?  It's because the current generation of people that are playing these games right now don't even come from the same place as you and the other older folks that are playing."

In my wife's theory, there has become a demographics gap in the audience of the MMORPG that exists between those who were exposed to all manner of high fantasy from all different kinds of genre's, and those who simply selected to play these games for the sake of solving the programming puzzle set forth by their creators.  The motivations of these players, less than flattering, at least from my perspective, when placed up against things like playing make pretend.

But it goes even a bit deeper than that.  You see, there is still a lingering thing that keeps us all playing together, a thing that obscures the actual difference between types but that ultimately defines each types overall satisfaction.  You see, the new generation is working on the game at the equivalent of an almost atomic level, while the older generation just wants to complete quests.

I recall my old friends Newton and Hardcore, and a conversation that I overheard one day while we were all grouping together.

Newton - We're not going to make it.  We don't have enough DPS.  My parser reads 100k, and we need at least 150K.

Hardcore - Well I guess that just means that we are going to have to try a little harder then lad!  What say ye?

Newton - Ok, but we're not going to make it.

1 minute after the wipe.

Newton - I told you we didn't have enough DPS.

Hardcore - That's ok, as long as ye gave it your all.....You did give it your all didn't you?

Newton - ............Of course.

Of course we all knew that Newton had not given it his all.  He had already had the data, provided to him by people that he felt were far superior than he was at playing the game, that had told him that he was going to fail at his endeavor.  And so he had not wasted one more single effort on trying to prove that data wrong.  Hardcore, on the other hand, not only did not have a parser installed, but had played the game for YEARS without giving any success or failure anymore thought other than that he would have to get whatever he was going after the next time.

Neither of these players were necessarily right, and neither were necessarily wrong, their play styles had just hit a wall that the demographic gap could no longer span.  The believer in fantasy that of the breakdown in his troops, and the believer of technology that of the insistence of what he considered the less than educated.

So this is what we are dealing with now.  And I shudder to think that the same thing might be going on inside the industry as well.  In my understanding it might be a lot easier to program a game from the perspective of gaining the right items to throw enough of one stat at a creature in order to beat it, but it would also be a LOT more boring to do so.

But then again I am old school and still want to pretend that I am a wizard.  So what do I know?

I'm not saying that you have to care about the Batman movie to be cool.  I'm not saying that you can't like one genre of high fantasy over another.  But what I am saying is that you should at least give make believe a chance.

In a world where many of your youngsters don't watch TV, don't have radios, and get to select exactly what goes into, and subsequently comes out of their brains, I believe we run the danger of losing the reason for genre at all.  And in world without genre, all these games end up becoming are collections of wasted production built up by poor kids who are missing out on some really cool opportunities.  The chance to overcome the insurmountable, the ability to actually feel good at something, and the satisfaction of working as a team are all things that us old heads have already gotten the chance to do repeatedly.

A kid or young adult should not be denied these pleasures just because they threaten the overall bottom-line of some accountants profit spreadsheet.

So to the developers, to the guides, and especially to the players. 

Put down the parsers and pick up a freaking book or movie!  You are living in never-never land, not in corporate America!  Sure, the min-maxers can roll over any game they want to, but those are some boring mofo's compared to my stupid self.

Also, don't believe everything you read on the internet.  The guys that put out all of that parse information gather it from going into these missions with a bunch of powerlevelled characters that they generally have no idea how to play. 

You can do better if you really want to.  And if you can't, it's your game creators fault.

Believe in fantasy.  Believe in Fun!  And don't let these creators off easy on either.

If the demographic gap really exists, and I believe it does, then let me be the first to draw the lines of battle here, and to say that it's going to be a really, really, boring, and long ride if all we have are quotas to fill in order to get through each expansion of each of these games.

In fact, if that is going to be the case, then we all may as well change our names to Sisyphus The Orc, and go and get customer service jobs.  At least then, in my understanding, we would be getting paid for the same thing.

Jesad

Years ago, as I have mentioned in previous entries, I worked as a QA tester for a legendary software company that was on it's way out.  Although these guys were good at what they did, and they were very good, the market for the kind of software they were creating had somewhat fallen out and they were struggling to find a new title to revitalize their sagging profits.  A good title, in any studio at that time, meant the difference between job security and pimping yourself out to the highest (or in some cases, any) bidder.  The idea, even then, and this was a good 7 or 8 years ago, being that if the studio could come up with a good enough product, that it would net the employee's of the company years of time in development with the added bonus of years more in patches, expansions, and sequels.  It was that old 80's mentality of milking something until it was bone dry and then still into annoyance, and loosely translated in the soon to be famous words of "Tony Stark" (see the Iron Man trailer) "...that's how dad did it, that's how America does it, and had worked out pretty well so far".

So one day, after weeks of the entire studio brainstorming on an idea for a new title, in the middle of killing some lunch hours playing this new game that had just come out, it hit me!  I called everyone, including the studio head, down to my cubicle and had them look at what I was seeing.  On my monitor screen was the, then very publicly accessible, server list for the game I had been playing called "Everquest".  "Do you see that?" I asked.  Every one of those accounts represents a software purchase and a residual $14.95 per month.  Of course, at the time, the game was new and there were TONS of people online.  "If you want to survive" I said, "This is the wave of the future."

Now I have done some dumb things in my life.  I am notorious for pulling from the pool of common thought that all creative people share and being so caught up in my ability to reach in there and pull something out that I do not pay attention to the ramifications of doing so, but fast forward 8 years later and it is painfully clear that I was not the only one guilty of doing so.

Who doesn't have a title running right now?

MMO's are coming and going so fast that it's becoming hard to tell if they are actually real titles or just something someone came up with and generated a stylish web banner for in order to fool people into putting their credit card numbers into someone else's database.  The ideas of creativity and professionalism have given way to C++, game engines, and patches and suddenly (or not so suddenly) there is truly no longer anything new under the sun.  As the business of making MMO's has grown the risk factors of doing anything differently or new have decreased to a point that the only thing that most of us can come up with now are ways to improve upon the old model.

I'm gonna go on a rant here for a minute so skip to the next paragraph if you don't want to be subjected to it.

Is it because we are the generation that was taught evolution so thoroughly that we only know how to create sequels and upgrades of things that already exist, that we use tools that, while powerful and convenient, limit us to doing things in only the ways supported by the tool makers while those same tool makers, in tandem with their business major financers/lackeys, dictate to us how and what should be possible?  What ever happened to the garage band?  The underground rap?  The black and white comic or the hippie consciousness?  Is nothing sacred anymore?  Or are we all just looking for a way to make a dollar and get out? 

MMO's are becoming "flash in the pan" in their frequency.  On this site alone there are enough steady newcomers to keep any Prozac deficient gamer from being able to settle on any one title yet there is so little innovation from title to title that game company's barely have to do more than create a new GUI in order to say that they have done something new.  I am hard pressed to believe that there are enough gamers out there to support every title that is running right now, meanwhile, there are more "boy band" and "action movie" formulated new releases coming every day.

The other night I happened to catch the video game awards on Spike TV and was amazed as I sat there looking at the people in the audience wondering, since when did so many extremely beautiful women show up for a geek convention?!?!  That's when I realized...

Flash in the pan titles, formula created content, and (and this was the clincher) hot chicks! = Show business.  I get it now; you all just wanna be big rock stars!

But what about the other shoe?  The independent film, the concept album, the garage developer?  Never forget that the basis of our entire community spawned from the ultimate garage band of all time (Gates and Jobs) and that, even though one of them happened to be a businessman in geeks clothing, it was their risk, their rage against the machine, that made all of this possible.

I don't hate on anyone trying to make a buck.  Lord knows, with the way that things are set up right now, we all need to and then some.  But this is a call to all the guys who already have jobs paying the rent, who have already made their millions and are sitting in Florida sipping margarita's and fishing, and even those who are unemployed and struggling but who still have a love for the genre and who still have the talent, creativity, and skill, to band together and pull this thing out of the rut it is heading into with some fresh ideas and some new ways of doing things.  I call to you because it is you who are the least susceptible to corruption.  If you already have it, they can't entice you with any more, and if you never had it, you know that it will come (meaning money) and so you are our only hope against the tides of programmers, artists, producers, and etc... that are rowing these massive boats and responding to the whip cracks of CFO's to crank out yet another repetition.

I know I go a little deep on this and that I have made more than one doomsayer entry since I began this blog, and for that I apologize.  But in my guilt I realize how easy it is to be corrupted by even the simplest of things, attention, appreciation.  And in that realization I now end my 6-month run to impress you all with my writing ability and return the world I love.  The world of obscurity, subtle manipulation, and creativity that born me, and with high hopes that I might be able to join the fight in bringing about change to the genre of games that I "oh so love" to play.  It is time that I mix back into the masses and stop being the loud guy, for that is the only way that I think I am really going to be able to do more than preach, at least, that is how it is in my understanding.

Some comments are just too dang big to clog up people's chat strings with.  In an attempt to pay respects though to the people who inspired this weeks entry I would like to attract your attention to the people who started this conversation first.

Laura Genender who inspired me with her blog spotlight lead-in to another bloggers post.

http://www.mmorpg.com/showFeature.cfm/loadFeature/1584

And Interl0per who inspired her thusly.

http://www.mmorpg.com/blogs/Interl0per

Now, assuming that you have popped over and read those posts, I can begin.

When I was a kid, in my 9th grade class, we watched a film in my science class about drugs.  I remember being scared out of my wits at the depiction of some tore up teenager making a drug induced decision one day that maybe, if he got enough height on the outset by scaling a tall building in his local area, that he would be able to fly.

Needless to say, dude didn't fly, and his lack of airspeed not only served the purpose of the example that it was supposed to set, namely, "Don't use drugs and do stupid things" but it clearly drove home the overall theme of the filmstrip to me and my entire class for years to come which was simply, "Don't do drugs."  Years later, amidst smokey rooms full of unemployed adults all huddled around glowing boxes linked together by cables and routers, I would often recall that filmstrip to my friends in the middle of passing a phattie back and forth or running to get another beer and remind them that "in spite of the euphoric feelings that may be produced from the intoxicants that we are about to recieve, NONE OF YOU WILL EVER BE ABLE TO FLY!"  Of course the room would break out into uncontrollable giggles as a lot of those guys went to my same school and knew exactly what I was talking about, but the message remained the same.  It was a good one.

Fast forward passed those days of Quake and Lan parties and friends to the day that me and my now famous one friend landed in the land of Athas in the Dark Sun Online game.  Sure, for it's time it was a pretty awesome deal, to be able to get online and play an rpg along side other folks who you didn't know and could compete against in levels and in combat.  Who wouldn't jump at a chance like that? 

Little did we know though, that it would be that little obscure game, that didn't host more than a couple of hundred people at a time, that would turn into a decade long addiction that to this very day has us repeatedly scaling tall buildings and jumping off again and again in that "oh so glorious" attempt to achieve altitude.

You see, no one ever tells you that MMO's are a drug at the beginning.  Sure, you learn soon enough after you take that first hit by logging in and building your character.  Most MMO players are more than happy to elude to the "crackness" of MMO play during a casual conversation.  Even then, however, it comes off like a joke, like something to laugh at and not to be taken seriously.  It doesn't come to you with the seriousness of that 9th grade filmstrip, it comes to you with the chuckle of that smokey room full of Quake players who, in their "maturity", have decided that in spite of the seriousness of the message, that it does not truly apply to their particular situation.

It won't be for years until one discovers, after a few lost relationships, a few lost jobs, and a plethora of leaps off that building and subsequent crashes to the hard earth, that this is EXACTLY that situation and that how you handle it has everything to do with whether you are going to end up like filmstrip boy (metaphorically speaking of course) or whether you are going to be able to actually look back on the time you spent in MMO-land fondly.

My friends in Vanguard probably think that I am crazy because, after every big grind, i.e. Wardship, Cragwind, CIS, Swamp Gear, I take a few weeks off to "come down" from the experience of having climbed to such heights.  A lot of them are younger and stronger than me of course, and still in the heights of their MMO abuse and, no sooner than they are finished with one thing, are raring to go get started on the next.  I however, have finally figured out, like Laura and Interl0per, that this is simply a race to the top of a building that is inevitably going to drop me crashing to the ground in a jumbled heap PROVIDED that I do not give the construction workers time to build more floors for me to climb.  We just put up our guild house (finally!), in Vanguard, and I haven't been there consistently in weeks since. But there is raid content right around the corner and I plan to be refuled and ready for the fight as soon as it drops.

Epiphany!  If the construction workers keep building floors there is a fairly good chance that my buzz might wear off before I reach the top of the building.  That I might simply choose to NOT go to the top and subsequently NOT jump over the edge.  WOOT!  I get to keep living! 

This would be a good end to an MMO.

Just like the day that we realized that we could not walk around in a constant state of weed induced stupor or drunk off our arses all day long, there should also be a day that we realize that "this game just isn't doing it for me anymore" and on that day we should not be unhappy or spent or metaphorically (or otherwise) dead.  We should be able to look back on our journeys as good ones, good times spent with good friends that although have passed, were worth every moment.

Am I saying to not play MMO's because they are bad for you?  Of course not.  If I did that it would be the ultimate in hypocrisy.  All I am saying is what that film strip said me me years ago still applies.  Be it drugs, alcohol, epic weapons, guild houses, or even Red Bull, none of this stuff is truly going to be able to make you fly, at least, that is my understanding.

Thanksgiving is normally for giving thanks for the blessings that we have recieved over the last year.  I realize though, that sometimes we might forget some of those blessings during the busy every day rush and craziness that can sometimes become our lives.  To tell the truth, I can not really recall the last time I wrote a positive post on any forum in the last year or so.  I, like many others, am guilty of only coming out of my shell to complain or request, there's always something that could have been done better, always something that could have been done differently.

Today I would like to remedy the lack of consideration I have shown to the guys and girls who make these games that I love to play and which have given rise to so many thoughts I have had over the years.  I am out of my element here so please bear with me if any or all of this post is less witty or more boring than any of my previous entries.  So without much further adeu, I'll begin.

Thank you MMO's for...

Inspiring me to learn how to type.  Because of you I have been able to parley that skill in to many many different channels both monetarily and personally lucrative to my life.

Providing me with a heavy bag to absorb the internalized aggressions that, expressed otherwise, may have led to my incarceration or early demise throughout the years.

Giving me the chance to actually play a role playing game instead of always being the one to run them.  You may not have been the best DM for me over the years but you most certianly have been the most consistent.

Allowing me to leave my house, socialize, pick up chicks, pick up dudes who look like chicks, drop dudes who look like chicks back off before actually doing anything that might tarnish my reputation, make friends, have some really great conversations and exchanges, hang out with my ex-girlfriends and so many other things that I might have never done, without actually having to physically get out of my chair (except for bio's and food) at any time, day or night.

Giving me the power to end drama with the flick of a switch.  Only nightmares come close to your ability to let things spin drastically out of control and then to escape them reasonably unscathed and with little or no fear of re-entry tomorrow.

For the graphics.  For allowing me to see myself dreaming and to enter the dreams of others.

For actually giving me a reason to want to learn Algebra.

Taking part in the inspiration for many people to use VOIP software.  Not only has this given me a chance to get to know many different people from all over the world but it has also given them the chance to get to know me.

Monontenous repitition, because it allowed me to survive for several years in some pretty hairy customer service jobs that sucked but that ultimately paid the bills.

For the chance to be a leader, the opportunity to lay low and follow, and the wisdom to know the difference.

For putting hair on my chest.  For the Dragon's, Alien Monsters, Demon's, and even Kings that you have allowed me to fight.  All to many times, in real life, such beings are so far removed and well protected that none of us ever get to even see them as much as challenge, fight, and/or destroy them.  And thank you for making the attempt every bit as incredible and as glorious a battle as anyone would expect.  Such things do not leave us how they found us but leave us changed, more and more, with each try.

For the breasts.

Finally, for giving me something to write about that I can begin, become involved with, and end without ever getting bored.  Many a "wanna-be" writer has looked for such a thing all their life and not found it.  I, on the other hand, can crank out these posts all day.

Well, that's it.  I tried to keep it as general as possible and I invite anyone who reads this to add to the "thank-you" list in the comments section.  I wish you all a HAPPY THANKSGIVING or whatever holiday you might celebrate in your country on that day and give thanks to you all for clicking on "In My Understanding" and at least running up the counter enough to inspire me to keep me going.

I've been looking at the differences between MMO's and the different books and movies that inspire the content from which they are created and I've come to a fairly dark conclusion.

We are all Orcs.

The basic story features a protagonist, an antagonist, and a particular situation that causes the two to clash.  In the best stories, the ones that inspire us and make us wish that we too could live in such worlds and take parts in such conflicts, either the protagonist, the antagonist or both are spawned from rather humble beginnings and through some strange and wonderful, or likewise horrible, twist of fate find themselves thrust into a strange new world full of incredibly unique situations of which they (the protagonist or antagonist) are key in effecting.  This is the hook that makes us keep watching/reading as the story, no matter how incredible, unfolds. 

The key element of the basic protagonist/antagonist of any story then is that he or she is special.  Even among other special beings the protagonist/antagonist of any good story, the hero, still has that little something extra that sets them apart from the rest of the pack.  A something that, as the story unfolds, will not only carry them from their humble beginnings to a place of belonging but beyond that still into the category of "Hero".  This is the theory of wonderment.  It is the gratification ultimately earned and deserved by the reader/viewer of any book that makes the time spent reading/watching, time that the reader/watcher will never get back, worth while.

It has already been stated on this blog, and in many other places, that MMO's lack the theory of wonderment.  Obstacles such as "balancing", "the gestalt formation", and the overall greed of the player base vs the overall laziness of the producers have made the word "wonderment" almost unattainable in most aspects of the games we play because, well, after all that balancing is done, after we learn that a good group needs a Tank, a Healer, and DPS at it's base, and after we all figure out which one of these things is going to bring us as close to being a key player in any configuration, we all end up just being Orcs.  Random soldiers of random battles can neither advance us individually beyond the preset caps that have been put in place to keep us gaffled nor advance our worlds in any way special or memorable beyond what the next group that comes along can do.

Luke Skywalker was not just a Jedi.  He was the Jedi that was fortold who would bring balance to the force.  Bilbo Baggins was not just a hobit, he was the first hobit willing to leave his comfortable surroundings in the shire and venture out into the world to DO something that would effect it.  Even though Frodo's story was all encompassing and infinately more involved, it was Bilbo who we most identified with because to him these things were all brand new.  There could have been no Frodo without Bilbo and so Bilbo carries the mark of the hero, the theory of wonderment.

MMO's have to find this theory again.  Put away the out-dated and commecial concepts that this is replayability suicide.  A Clue - Most people aren't lingering that long anyway.  Your best weapons for emmersion then are the weapons that are usually spent prior to the opening of the game i.e. player/development interaction in the context of role-play and world changing events.  Sure, a lot of these elements still exist but, in my opinion, they are far too few and far too long in between to really amount to an interactive world with a properly functioning theory of wonderment.

I look to the future for something different.  Something or some way to seperate us from the orcs.  The Awakening of the Sleeper, was a good concept but I think there is still WAY more to be done in this area.  You always here them asking in OOC.  "Will there be events?".  "What is the best weapon in the game?", "Which is the best character?".  To me, the answer to these questions should not be plural, meaning that they should not represent the same thing to all members of the game, they should be publicized, planned and plotted content meant to provide players with the sense of wonderment that they all came to recieve.  Sure, in a system like this "there can be only one".  But isn't that what it's really all about?  Isn't that why we cheat?  Hack? and Exploit the game?  Done properly, I think that a good event system could increase the player base of any game exponetially.  Some of the best games out there to play already know this.  I still look for more however.  More in the way of world shaping, more in the way of the ultimate power or the possibility of pinnacle of player performance.  We all rage against the levelling machine, the raiding machine, the perfomance machine, and in the end we all end up the same.  Orcs.

We don't need another hero, we need a legend.

Be it occasionally sponsered, seasonally programmed, or one-time hard coded, events are the way to go.  It can be facilitated in a variety of ways.  Give stories to some of these huge patches, start rumors about incredible weapons or items of power and then assign these items a finite number.  Already, in games that I have played, there have been nerfed items that have been left in the game after the nerfing that have provided the player base will all kinds of wonderment and differentiation.  I'm just saying, lets do more of this on purpose.  The reason we leave, the reason we roam, is because eventually, sooner or later after all the raiding is done and all the content has been consumed, we all become orcs.  In order for future games to differentiate themselves from the pack then, in my understanding, developers must harness that which is happening by mistake and give it a name, create that which causes change and name it the same, support that which promotes alliegience and call it that thrice, and an excalibur or glaive, or even R2-D2 would be nice.

Heh, time for me to stop for now.